#8sunday, 16/03/20 The Runaway 2

Greetings, Weekend Writing Warriors!  These are the next sentences in  my WIP about a boy who finds himself on a rail pod after escaping from a medical facility in a time and place far from here. This week, we find out what happened to Smith, one of the medtechs who had managed Blagdan’s unpleasant treatments at the facility.

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The boy shuddered. Smith had been made strange in his death. His familiar face had been so indefinably altered that the boy had not recognised him when he found his crumpled form at the medtech station.

Blagdan had hovered. Scant moments of confusion and indecision stretched into infinity. The analog timepiece fixed on the wall behind the station ticked loudly, echoing down the empty corridors.

In an instant he was released into a frenzy of action. Grabbing Smith’s pass card, he fled to the forbidden staff change room. Scrambling into Smith’s outdoor wear had taken only a few frantic heart beats. Before he had even taken stock of the situation, he found himself shivering on the grey sidewalk outside the Facility.

© Kim Magennis 2016

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35 thoughts on “#8sunday, 16/03/20 The Runaway 2

  1. I always look forward to reading your posts, Kim. I think you should publish a book of short stories. You are stellar at creating tension and wonder in a few words. I’d buy it!

    Like

    1. Teresa, thank you. I am accumulating material for the end of the year.) As a twist on the classic book club, I belong to one where to be a member, everyone has to write a book. I am up first ;-} )

      Like

  2. The fact that he thinks of it as an analog timepiece, not a clock, makes me think he’s unfamiliar with the term, which further distances his world from ours. Excellent snippet! I saw it all in black and white!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Spooky and emotional! Good excerpt, Kim. I like the analog clock ticking loudly, emphasizing the emptiness of the corridor. And I like the grey sidewalk, that visual brings home what “facility” really means in this context.

    Marcia

    Liked by 1 person

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