Greetings, Weekend Writing Warriors!
Here is the next instalment of the third chapter of my short story about Daniel.
Daniel’s suicide attempt is thwarted by a two-second admin error by the Alien Specimen Collection Centre. The Alien Specimen Handlers decide to dispose of their ‘error’ by inserting Daniel into another world, and he finds himself being processed as an undocumented alien by the Galactic Government of Argle. During his induction, Daniel inadvertently qualifies himself for assignment to ASS. He is handed over to an earnest alien called Dravid. The story continues in Chapter Three: Waking Up In Someone Else’s Bed. Daniel is standing in front of the bathroom mirror, looking at the results of his ‘conversion’. (Please excuse my creative punctuation!)
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How long he stood there in his horrified thrall, he did not know. This was a right royal stuff up, in fact, he could not imagine a single situation in his unspectacular life that would out-rank this in the class of highly-likely-to-be-regretted-for-a-very-long-time incidents.
Slowly, his senses shifted their attention from his outraged sight. “Oh, crap!” his groan echoed in the emptiness of the room, having burst, involuntarily from his immobile, blank face.
He could smell water, soap and cleaning agents, and the lingering scent of the person who had last been in the room. The tiles beneath his feet felt smoothly synthetic, and under his fingertips, the porcelain of the washbasin had not been evenly glazed. As he considered his impossible reflection, he noticed that the glass was dusted with tiny bubbles.
Still in shock, and not being capable of deciding what else to do, Daniel obediently turned to the shower stall, and turned on the taps. As he stood under the prickling jets of hot water, he heard the water rushing through the pipes in the wall. He soaped, rinsed and dried off with the white fluffy towel, which had been hung just within his reach.
Kim Magennis 2017
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I love how your descriptions really bring us into the scene and make it more visceral. Great job!
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Very strange goings-on. Creepy beyond all imagination.
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Love his word choice, he really knows how to turn a phrase. I suspect his freak-out meter is broken right now, and he’ll have a break down over the weirdness later. At least he gets a fluffy towel, though.
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I’ve missed several snippets, so I’m sort of at a loss, except the conversion must have done a number on him but good! Gotta go back and read up to here!
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This snippet seems so normal yet leaves me feeling edgy. Like something is underneath and it’s not good. Very good.
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I think I’d be freaking out here, but he just washes up. Cool.
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Still a creepy situation for him but I gather his senses have been augmented in this conversion? This is THE most fascinating story – another great snippet.
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He’s really admirably calm, considering the situation!
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This is such a good story, Kim.
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This is turning out to be a most unusual story. When he looked in the mirror and saw himself, it gave me the shivers. I’m a bit like Charmaine. I want him to be free of the outer cover again.
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Now you’ve made me wonder if this is a normal shower!
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Please let the water remove the shield surrounding him. Or magic soap or some damn object. Turn him loose!
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This is such a creative, well-described scene! Very enjoyable to read, Kim!
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This is believable, I’m sure some people would do exactly as Daniel does here and some might run screaming from the room. Poor guy, I’m worried about him!! 🙂
Marcia
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Much later in the story, Daniel finds out that there were a few others before him, and it did not end well for them for that reason.
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‘right royal stuff up’ love that. And washing up seems so normal when everything else is not, makes it even more intriguing.
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Thank you Fallon!
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Nice! It’s working opposite of what we’d think–he hasn’t lost any senses; they are actually heightened. I am loving this story, Kim!
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This is a suitably creepy, off-kilter washroom. Love it!
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Thank you, Ed. “Life” gets really weird for Daniel.
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Even though he is doing what he was told, I can sense his shock. Great snippet! 🙂
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Thank you Jessica!
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